Manny Woood

Manny Ramirez is heading to the Dodgers.The Dodgers agreed today to acquire the talented but troubled slugger from the Boston Red Sox, two sources speaking anonymously because the club had not yet announced the deal told The Times. Ramirez waived his no-trade clause in order to complete the trade, a source confirmed.

Fuuuck my worst nightmare came true now maybe my dumb ass cousin who Manny asked out on a date might actually marry this guy now that he is in L A who knows. But is this the best thing for Manny and his antics who knows? Will Hollywood embrace his actions or rebel who knows ?What I do know is that there is 4 trillion Ramirezes in LA Cha ching jersey sales .hahah Whats your opinion?

Comic duo Cheech and Chong reform

Cheech (r) and Chong played bumbling 'stoners' in their films
Comedy duo Cheech and Chong, who made a series of films and albums in the 1970s and 80s, are set to tour again more than 20 years after they split.
The pair, whose routines were based on the hippie era and its associated free love and drug culture, will kick off the Light Up America tour in September.
The US comedians said they decided to reform because neither of them "are getting any younger".
Cheech, 62, and Chong, 70, won a Grammy award for best comedy album in 1973.

Drug-addled hippie
They starred in eight comedy films, invariably playing a pair of bumbling "potheads".
The pair, who split in 1987 due to creative differences, told reporters in Los Angeles that they had "kind of resolved" their "veiled hatred".

They decided that reuniting for a comedy tour would be "the most fun" and "the least hassle".
After their split, the two comedians embarked on solo careers, with Cheech Marin performing voice work for a number of films including The Lion King.

Tommy Chong became best known for playing drug-addled hippie Leo in sitcom That 70s Show.
In 2003 he was jailed for nine months for selling drug paraphernalia over the internet.
During the trial he admitted to having a marijuana problem.

It's about time these guys get a clue .

THE MIKE STERLING is finally a legit member of the riff

Kobe who???

Paul Pierce says he's the best player in the worldBy J.E. Skeets Finals MVP Paul Pierce, who recently spent three days at a ball camp in Madrid, is making, ahem, news about what he said to a Spanish reporter. The money translation, via RedsArmy: "Q: Is Kobe really the best player in the world? Pierce: I don't think Kobe is the best player. I'm the best player. There's a line that separates having confidence and being conceited. I don't cross that line but I have a lot of confidence in myself." Surprisingly, Spurs fans seem more upset by this than actual Lakers fans. (Update: OK, Lakers Nation is pretty upset, too.)

Finally someone speaks out about being better than Kobe . Hey man this guy earned the right he took over in the finals and did what he had to do in the finals be a team player be a leader during the entire play offs .There was no way this guy was going to walk off the court without a ring . And in my opinion Kobe did not show up when he was needed and his team didnt show up either case closed anyone can show up when the game isnt on the line during the season . KOBE ,STEVE NASH . But when the game is on the line and the ring is at steak you have to show up . Paul did Kobe did not . Paul has the right to say he is the best player in the world case closed.

I GO AGAINST THE GRAIN...

Its hard to be a Clipper fan. I love em to death but the shit is hard. Especially when you live in Southern California, the land of purple of gold. Been in southern Cali all my life and i was taught to hate the Lakers at a young age. You see pops was a Larry Legend fan and i was instantly enchanted by Jordan the first time i saw him play. I grew up in the middle of the Showtime era In LOS ANGELES Los Angeles where no other team but the Lakers exist as far as the natives are concerned.

I was introduced to Clippers around 1990 when bitch ass first round draft pick Danny Ferry declined to play for the Clips and took his underachieving ass to Italy before coming back and a year later forcing a trade to the Cavs, who gave us Ron Harper. At the tender age of 9 i really had no idea what kind of franchise i would be backing. Had no idea that my team was in the middle of 10 straight years of 50 or more losses. Had not one clue that to that point the Clips had failed to make the playoffs every year since moving to Los Angeles. Didn't have a hint that this was a team that had traded away Terry Cummings, Rickey Pierce, and Craig Hodges for Marques Johnson, Junior Bridgeman, and Harvey Catchings (who the fuck...).

We are the face of mediocrity. We've had 3 playoff seasons in 24 years. The Los Angeles Clippers franchise's history is highlighted by a SECOND ROUND appearance in 2006 (fuck you Raja Bell). I think about these things and a few questions come to mind:

How the fuck is Elgin Baylor still our GM? He's been our GM for 22 fu**ing years! Does anyone else find it odd that he's been at the Draft Lottery Table 19 out of 22 years? Did Elgin save Donald Sterling from a blazing fire in a past life and then did Mr. Sterling (Donald, not Mike) pledge his undying devotion to him? Unbeli...and can we please change those outdated, cursive writing, we dress like we're gonna lose uniforms already? Shit man, just talking about this makes my blood boil.

No other sports fans know what we go through. Literally, no one. Maybe Montreal Expos fan...and Arizona Cardinal fan (they'll never win anything). To stay loyal to a team in a city where your team will always be second fiddle takes unmeasurable discipline. Maybe your mind wanders to a team like the Chicago White Sox or NY Mets or even the New York Jets. Its got to be hard on those fans, knowing that whatever happens the Cubs, Yanks, and NY Football Giants will always rule those respective cities.

But even those fans have tasted success that I've only imagined about. The Sox won it in '05, the Mets were amazing in 1986, and before he was getting sauced up and hitting on Suzy Kolber on national TV(I wanna kiss you right now!), Broadway Joe guaranteed his Jets to a Super Bowl win. What does Clipper Nation have? Fuckin Keith Closs and Michael Olowakandi.


What makes me most upset is how Laker fans don't take us seriously. Ask a Laker fan about the Clippers and they don't hate us. They say shit like "the Clippers are cool, i kind of root for them since they're an LA team." Don't patronize me you spoiled sons of bitches...its like the Clippers are this cute 5th grade basketball team that everyone reeeeaaaally hopes does well. We're not even good enough to be hated back. Im a simple man. I have modest dreams. One of them is for the Clippers to be consistently good enough to be hated by Laker fans everywhere.


With all that being said i bleed red, white and blue. Names like Bo Kimble, Danny Manning, Ron Harper, Mark Jackson, Loy Vaught, Gary Grant, Ken Norman and Stanley Roberts bring a smile to my little face. Maybe I'm addicted to that agonizing feeling of pain and disappointment or maybe my loyalty and patience will be rewarded someday. Either way if you're a bandwagon fan you have no idea what I'm talking about and you should dive head first into helicopter propellers while the helicopter is lifting off. You're less than nothing and i hate everything you stand for.


Looking ahead to the 2008-09 season I feel overcomed by genuine optimism. Elton Brand's departure hurt like a K-Rod fastball right to the testicle. Maggettee can kick rocks, I'm glad he's finally gone. Getting Marcus Camby is huge, really softens the blow of losing Brand. Rickey Davis just adds depth and firepower off the bench. Eric Gordon is gonna be special, straight up. Thorton's gonna be just nasty in his 2ND year and the prodigal son has returned home. Baron effing Davis is our point guard. It feels so good to type that!!!


Here's to the Clips making some noise this year in the Pacific Division.


Clipper Nation!

Controversy of the week 2

Who is HOTTER Ursula Mayes or Jessica Alba ? This seems to be a topic that no one can find an answer to so someone put this question to rest.

Varganator

ps my Wack cousin says this chick is hotter than all these bitches lucious liz someone take the hini out his hands and take the pills out his mouth .pss he's a saints fan...

"If you were a hot dog, would you eat yourself? I would," Harry Carey.

"...and here comes the three two offering, strike three. Wow, Zambrano is still standing in the batters box in disbelief at that last call, he sure would love that call when he's on the mound. Oh boy, here comes Lou out of the Cub's dugout and he does not look very happy... wait a minute...whats this? A fan is out on the field running towards home plate, no that's not a fan that's new Cubs owner Mark Cuban..."

Get ready baseball fans, this could be a recurring scene at Wrigley if Cuban is allowed ownership of the Cubs. I say allowed because I doubt baseball owners would allow this nouveau riche to join their exclusive club. After all they did kick out one of their own, former Reds owner Marge Schott. (Marge Schott once said, "everyone knows Hitler was good at the start, he just went crazy in the end." Yeah, 6 million dead Jews later, crazy)

Who are these owners anyway, do they represent The New World Order or something? Are they the ones responsible for killing JFK because he didn't want Hank Aaron to load, wash and ride in the back of the team bus? Did they shoot a missile at The Pentagon on 9/11 because DC would not build a new stadium for the Nationals?

Did they plant the weapons of mass destruction in Iraq so the US would go to war to distract America from the steroid scandal?

Who knows? This Cub fan says let Cuban buy the Cubs, and while your at it let the Cuban players come and go as they please Mr. Castro.

Post By THE MIKE STERLING (OF THE MARINA DEL REY STERLINGS)

Who is Mike Sterling?

Who the fuck is Mike Sterling? To most American people the name Mike Sterling sounds like a Rapist /Baby Rapper/Wife Beater/Masked murderer. Mike Sterling is not any of these... at least that's what he says . He is not just a man, he is a god . His favorite beverage is old spice . His hair makes Patrick swazie's hair look like a hobo's . He's so gangsta he ripped off Wade Boggs mustache and pasted it on his own face . He is so raw when a girl asked if he could buy her a drink, he replied "My own daddy don't buy my momma a drink."

"Michael Winthorpe Sterling III is a representation of America's elite, a blue blood if you will. Mike's father was in the war, an officer of course, a favorite topic of conversation which Mike shares with his fellow chums at The Club sipping brandy or Louie XIV while smoking Davidoff cigarettes out of his Sterling Silver cigarette extender. His passion for sports and conversation are only matched by his razor sharp wit and charm. Women cannot take their eyes off him and find themselves captivated by each and every word that falls from his lips, " as said by Michael W Sterling III when asked about who really was behind the words that grace this fascinating blog.

KEEP IT RIDING DIRTY

Dirty30 is Washington Redskin safety, and former All American out of LSU, LaRon Landry, AKA LL-DrrTay, AKA LL-ThrrTay. When #30 is on the field it does not take long for him to make his presence felt, just ask Brodie Croyle or John Parker Wilson or Plexi-Glass Burress. Landry started for the 2003 National Champion LSU Tigers, played four impressive years there and was drafted as the sixth overall pick by the Redskins.

In his first preseason game against the Titans, Landry introduced himself("Dirty Thirty Style") to the Titans quarterback. His entire football career is filled with violent collisions. To some this may be seen as dirty, meaning cheap. To others, myself included, I see it as hard nosed football. I say it is the job of the safety to inflict damage to the offense. The opposing receivers can not be allowed to run free in the secondary. They need to know, deep down in their hearts that "The Dirty Thirty" is out there, waiting, lurking like an ominous cloud on the horizon.

Quarterbacks need to know that at any time they might taste the bone crushing hit from D-30, its not if, but when will the hit take place. Safeties are the enforcers, they are the hit men, players like Ronnie Lott, who may be the best safety ever, Jack Tatum, who might be the most dirty player ever, John Lynch, Roy Williams and Bob Sanders who uses his body like a hit seeking missile. All of these players walk that fine line that separates a hard nosed football player and cheap shot specialist.

Perhaps the most notorious safety in the last 20 years to have a rep of taking cheap shots is former Eagle safety Andre Waters, AKA "Dirty Waters". After hitting quarterback Jim(Chris) Everett, the NFL made it illegal to hit QBs below the waste while in the pocket; the unofficially named Andre Waters Rule.

So what constitutes a dirty hit? What makes a player dirty? Is it malice or intent that makes a player dirty? These guys are paid to hit, they are programmed to destroy the opposition. As mentioned before, it is the job of the safety to establish a presence of fear in a league where fear is not accepted or admitted. Call it fear, doubt, concern or self preservation, the opposing receivers will run wild if this presence is not enforced. The job of the offense is to score points. They will run up the score if they are allowed to every time, with no mercy. The offense would pound the ball down the defences' throat and score 50 points a game if allowed. Yards allowed per game and points allowed per game is how a defense is rated.

From high school football, to college football, to the NFL if a defence is abused on the field the week before they pay for it the very next week. They pay in practice, where they are run into the ground by angry coaches who are in fear of losing their jobs. Defenders are yelled and screamed at until something gives. Either the player decides football is too rough and they go play baseball or soccer, or, or a chip on their shoulder develops and they realize the only way to survive in football is to have the ability inflict punishment on the opposition or the ability to take all the punishment the opposition gives. It is hit or be hit. For a defender his job is to stop the offense. To win in football a defender must destroy the offenses ability to move the ball.

So where does a defender draw the line. Some players like Dirty 30 live on that line. That line is where they play the game. "The hit" is how players like Landry and Lott get paid. That line defines them and separates them from the rest. Defense wins championships. The safety is the last line of defense. That is why the safety plays the way he does. If the safety gets beat the offense usually scores. Every safety knows his responsibility, they carry this load every time they step on the field. With every bone crushing hit delivered the weight of that load diminishes.

In the end a player is not defined as dirty, in the end a player is perceived to be dirty. Perception is in the eye of the beholder. I say this is one of those deals where it depends on where the player in question plays or played, in other words if his momma call him Clay, I'm a gonna call him Clay.

Woa, where did that come from? In others words, if the player in question, "Dirty 30" for example, is on my team, I say he is NOT dirty, he is just a badass. BUUUT, if D-30 was from, I don't know maybe from hated Auburn or Alabama, I would say he was dirty as all hell. BUUUT, he is not from either of those ####ing schools, he happens to be a LSU Tiger, so ##** you if you think he's dirty.

POSTED BY THE MIKE STERLING (OF THE KENNY BUNKPORT MAINE STERLINGS)

FROM POP TO HEX TO COUNTRY???

TONY HOMO’S Hex girlfriend JESSICA SIMPSON is completely insane. Apparently she has written a country music song for her man TONY HOMO called, YOU’RE MY SUNDAY. And she has also announced she is no longer a retarded pop star, she is now a retarded country star.

Is that legal? Can you do that, change from a bone smuggling pop star to a country music singer? Maybe JERRY JONES had something to do with this. I mean JERRY JONES aka LEX LUTHER aka BIG BABY JESUS .Is the GODFATHER. I mean JERRY JONES is such a “G” he could talk mother TERESA into being a prostitute in hell.

And I am pretty sure in JERRY JONES ‘S wildest coked out dreams, he could have wished this scenario before last year’s playoff’s. He would have changed JESSICA’S career to a useless country singer a long time ago. Instead she is now known as the Dallas Hex job.

Think about it, TONY HOMO wouldn’t have met her, she would have been playing the loose moose parking lot, and he would never have blown the biggest game of his life due to the JESSICA SIMPSON HEX. After that loss I am positive the only thing that was on JERRY JONES’S mind was erase JESSICA SIMPSON off the earth.

SOOOO did JERRY JONES work out this master plan to convert JESSICA SIMPSONS to be country music loser? I doubt it, but maybe in his sick mind this move is a dream come true and is the best scenario for JERRY, his fans and his star QB.

The way I see it best case scenario, JESSICA SIMPSON will ruin her pointless career with her retarded country pop music. .TONY HOMO will move on and dump this bitch and probably date my sister. And who knows maybe by next play off time, HOMO won’t show up with that hex in a pink jersey. And Dallas might actually win a playoff game.

So in conclusion, If HOMO is still dating JESSICA by the next playoffs. Don’t be surprised if the Dallas police department and their owner JERRY JONES .Find JESSICA SIMPSON in a dumpster, wearing a pink TONY HOMO jersey, missing her legs, with her face shoved up her ass. And a note attached to her saying LACES OUT!!! Don’t say I didn’t warn you America .JERRY JONES don’t play, he owns the mafia TRUUUST ME.

Varganator

Why Do Women Insist on Playing Sports?...

Good day to readers everywhere. With this being my first official post, i wanted to formally greet everyone who graces us with their presence.

That being said, lets jump right into it... I come home yesterday from a long, hard day's work and grab myself a cold refreshment. Naturally within seconds i turn on the T.V. and quickly turn it to ESPNNEWS and to my surprise i see highlights (if you want to call it that) of a "fight" between the L.A Sparks and Detroit Shock. Who? You ask. Well, the Sparks and Shock are two professional women franchises in the WNBA.

Can we put an end to this already? What are we trying prove? Who in their right mind watches the WNBA? Who watches ANY women's sports? Look, women...i get it, ok? I get that whole "we can do anything that men can do" attitude that you so proudly portray to anyone that will listen but cmon, lets all be real with ourselves.

That "fight" yesterday was the most attention i've ever seen the WNBA get. Straight up. You sure as hell wont see that much attention given to them for their play. Have you ever seen a game? It's a circus spectacle highlighted by turnovers, missed shots, fouls, and just plain awkward basketball. Even during the WNBA Finals, there's a reason they dont show those highlights until after Baseball, Pre-season Football, Pre-season NBA, Golf, Nascar, Track and Field, Badminton, Cricket, so on and so on because NOBODY CARES!

That goes for all sports but im willing to make an exception for Tennis and Golf. Some of those girls can play. But thats it. Diana Taurasi can play. Candice Parker might post me up because she's 8'4". But that is absolutely it. You could literally assemble the best women basketball players in the world and theyre not fucking with my Monday night team. Straight up.

They dont help themselves either. Have you ever seen those WNBA commercials they run trying to promote the league? They have some of the "big names" use the sarcastic approach. Candice Parker has a commercial where she's saying "im sorry, but you couldnt pay me to watch womens basketball" followed by "nothing exciting ever happens" and she finishes by saying "what kind of future does that league have? None that i could see." All the while showing women shooting LAYUPS and shooting the most basic of jumpers, as if that's supposed to prove that the league IS exciting. The nerve of these b...... you see, they figured the product of women's basketball is so good that they could try and use the old reverse psychology route.

Who in god's green earth approved that idea? Jesus, talk about making it easy for the millions of critics and doubters around the world to continue to critisize and doubt the WNBA.

Every guy knows what im talking about...youre at your local park or gym with some friends playing basketball, winning games, feeling good. All of a sudden the next team comes on the court and you see a girl warming up, shooting with that extra small ball, pony tail, sleeves rolled up to her shoulders, cleaning the bottom of her shoes with her palms and you think to yourself..."great."

Now for the duration of that game whoever is guarding her is forced to play at half speed. It's like 9 guys now have to cater around Susie Shoots ALot because she feels she can run with the fellas. Pisses me off. Go away. You're not good. Go away.

In conclusion i have an idea on how to cut the crime in this country by 50%. When someone commits a crime, they should be ordered to watch the Women's NIT Basketball Tournament, Women's NCAA Basketball Tournament, Women's Pre-season WNBA, or a WNBA regular season game. Depending on the severity of the crime, they should be ordered to watch these catastrophies. For example, a carpool violation should watch a WNBA game, maybe a thief should watch the Women's NCAA Tournament, a murderer definitely would get the Women's NIT and so on and so on. I guarantee the next time "Joker"or "Gizmo"decide to ride on someone theyll think twice before they act.

Look, im not a sexist. Women are beautiful, passionate creatures and they bring a lot to the table. Basketball's just not one of them.

Clipper Nation!!!

AUDRINA PATRIDGE ??? Who the fuck is this bitch and why do I know her name?

I cannot believe I know this chick’s name, let alone care who the fuck she is. This chick is just another cock chew chick that makes too much money for no reason. I mean I could see if this chick had some major ass and some major tits and actually had some type of talent. But the fact that this bitch looks like DOLPH LUNDGREN / HELLBOY makes this bitch as useless as a nun’s cunt.

Honestly, if you live in a cock slap state and everyone looks like Dennis Eckersley and you never get to see real hot chicks, I can understand why you jack off to this chick all night long and care about her life. BUUUUT , I live in CALIFORNIA and this bitch isn’t shit. She looks like PETER FRAMPTON on a cock binge. Trust me a girl like this in California is a dime a dozen and they are all looking for a rich guy with an American Idol make over and a gay name like Mitch /Conner /Cody/ Skyler /Dakota /Taylor/Apple/ or PEREZ HILTON. That profile and names equals Prince Charming for a slut like this.

And who the fuck pays this bitch to show up to a club? They actually pay this bitch $5,000 just to show the fuck up and drink at their wack ass club. I mean for that price this bitch better be on her knees at the door passing out free blow jobs. Anyone standing in front of the line trying to get a glimpse or a picture of this bitch is a complete waste of skin and is most likely a bigger cock slap than her .

SO MY FINAL QUESTION IS WHO THE FUCK IS THIS GIRL? WHY THE FUCK DO I KNOW HER NAME? UNTIL SOMEONE CAN GIVE ME A LEGITIMATE ANSWER, I SAY GO FUCK YOUR SELF AUDRINA PATRIDGE !!!

Controversy of the week

Let me ask you a question. Are you tired of a co-workers /friends making outrageous opinions or statements? Is he/she talking shit or giving way to many props to a favorite player/team/actor/actress/movie/etc? Do you feel that they have no clue what they are talking about? Well my friends your dream has come true. This is your chance to take no prisoners and to have an open floor with your controversial question and resolve the controversy once and for all. Post your controversy and your argument and we can all duke it out mano e mano right here on the Riff Rough Draft!!!

Now I wanted to bring up a topic a slap dick co –worker of mine will not stop ranting about. And I wanted to share it on the blog with the riff ruff wryders/you to see what your opinions are on this topic.

The question is:
Which LT would you select to be your franchise player with the #1 draft pick and why?
Ladanian Tomlinson or Lawrence Taylor

#56

Rampage Ridin Dirty

Hooooly shit America, rampage is arrested riding dirty. Noo! you don’t say! I can’t believe it! You mean a guy that hooowls at the moon every 3 steps and wears a boat chain around his neck has mental problems?

This guy was arrested for a hit in run involving two cars, driving on the wrong side of the road and driving on the sidewalk. Don’t get me wrong any cock face that drives like that with a life size poster on the side of his car, trying to outrun the cops deserves to get shot in the face. Personally I would have arrested the guy based off the gayness of the life size self portrait/poster on the side of his truck. But this incident reminded me of some of our favorite teen sluts.

These crimes Rampage Jackson was arrested for, is mere child’s play compared to the bull shit Paris cockslap Hilton, Britney fuck face Spears and Lindsey cock chew Lohan get away with. I mean those chicks daily run over people, crash into cars all while snorting coke off a boyfriends dick . And they get away with these crimes everyday. Even when the cops do pull the dicks out their mouths, they send these sluts to rehab or jail and they release them home the same day. Is this justice? So I ask America, am I the only person in the world that thinks these chicks should die? And I say we have rampage run these bitches over with his truck and let the paramedics sort them out. That way we can move on to the next future rehab slut Hannah Montana. Peace

Varganator

Mayockisms

Some of you might know who Mike Mayock is. Mayock is a former NFL player and a frequent analyst on the popular NFL network. And he is a legend in my book. I enjoy every word this guy says. Not only is he on top of his game on prediction of the NFL draft and his evaluation of rookies. (He is one of the few that totally calls the Raiders Mcfadden a character risk- hahaha, anyone who says that is a legend in my book) What I love most about this guy is that he not only teaches me about football, he is also preaching to me about life(Relationships). Yes, relationships.
Let me explain. Mike has tons of analogies for the game. Here are some Mayockisms we often use when it comes to describing relationships and women to each other.

1. The Franchise.

The franchise is you, yourself. You pick the players/person in your life and we are always looking for the bigger faster/sexiest sweetest) person we can find that fits our system/life. As the franchise, we are looking for either a long term player/person or a bunch of free agents/hoes/fluzzyz bitches/whores... you get the idea- That we can do the famous ritual the Four F’S to: find, feel, fuck and forget.

You are the franchise. You choose what you want in life. Steady and stable or up and down roller coaster. It’s your life. It’s your franchise.

2. Franchise Player.

Mike uses this term for a lock it up- tj huzurmomma. This is a top ten pick(player/person) for your franchise/yourself. In life most men and woman are looking for that franchise player, that person that will be perfect for you. The person that makes all the right plays(sex/good decisions). This is the person you build your franchise/self around. They are the person that is going to win the super bowl(marriage) for you. The person you picture yourself standing next to on that podium. Hoistin' up a superbowl trophy and trying on your new super bowl ring/wedding ring.

3. Upside

Upside means that a certain player/person has a lot of potential. But not at the present time. They are viewed as a future potential pro-bowler. They may either be overweight or nerdy or just has a small flaw that is holding them up from being a franchise player. I would say a player/person who has upside could flip flop either way. You could end up with a Tom Brady on your hands and be a for-sure hall of famer. Or a total Ryan Leaf bust on your hands. It could go either way and it could be very messy. Especially if the person/player never lives up to the full potential and you have a lot of time and money invested in this individual. Choose wisely.

For example: Hey, that chick you are dating, isn’t she a little bit chubby? Answer: Yes, but I have her on the Varganator weight training program. She has a lot of upside if she loses weight, she will go from a zero to a hero. (Based on a True Story)

4. High motor guy.

Mike uses this term for a player/person that is in excellent condition and also has the ability to make the big play/sex) every single time they are in the game/relationship. They may not be the best player on the field but you know they are bringing 110% (She's the one that has that smoken hot body but maybe she has a hook nose, and a couple of snaggle teeth and a lazy eye). We use it as a term for players/person that is excellent in the sack a player/person that always wants sex and always knows how to rock your socks but just doesn't have that natural talent (looks) to be a hall of fame player. A high motor player/person can go a couple extra rounds though and is a person who can take you deep into overtime. They are the players/person that love going the extra mile. While most players are burned out by half time, your player/person is the energizer bunny. Every franchise she have a high motor player/person.

5. Off the Field/Character issues:

Mike uses this term for a player/person who has issues unrelated to the sports that could effect the franchise(you). These actions are related to family issues, kid issues, bad behavior, drugs and Alcohol. Anything that has to do with lack of focus and actions that cause the Franchise/you problems. Of course any person that has these issues are always a high risk for your Franchise. And of course no one wants to deal with these problems especially when there are so many free agents/singles and new rookies coming out every year into the market/world .

For example: Wow, your girl has 6 kids, and the babies daddy is getting out of jail next week? Looks like she has a lot of off the field issues. I know you met her at the Loose Moose and she had a nice college career playing JuCo ball but there is no way she is gonna make the 53 man roster. But hey if you want to put her on your developmental/practice squad thats your decision. Just don't say I didn't warn you when she is on the news busted for stealing diapers and cigarettes at the local Quickie Mart and your Franchise is taking a PR hit all over the sports stations (your friends and family are bustin your balls about this chick)

6. Work ethic:

This has to be the number one trait every franchise is looking for in a player. Mike uses this term for players who show true dedication, desire and passion for the game/relationship.These are players that are highly motivated, pro-active and take the initiative into their own hands. This type of (player/person) are very focused on making good decisions for the franchise and are as solid as a rock when times get tough. They are not looking for the next hot club or drinking all night at bars their focus is for nothing less than a trip to the super bowl /wedding they like to work out stay in shape all year long. They cook, clean and do all the little things to keep the franchise ranting and raving (GM and the Head Coach are high fiving each other, the Owner is smiling and life is good) This player is constantly doing the right things (has at least one United Way Charity commercial) and are seen as a perfect example of a true professional around the community as well as envied by other Franchises(your friends) out there.

For example: Damn, your girl has a great work ethic. She cooks, she cleans your boxers with her bare hands and she keeps the hot cheets and cold IBC coming! Damn.
Answer: Yeah... and she is having a MVP type year. She must be looking for a long term deal.

Well those are a few of Mayockisms we like to use when talking about chicks. And you would be surprised how much it does help the communication process. Plus if you are in a crowded or public area it helps to hide your dialogue with a friend around other people, and saves you being over head asking: Do think that chick is hot? -Instead it metamorphisizes into: Is that a franchise pick right there? Answer: Yeah, seems to have all the measurables... A player like that would probably fit into any system. Reply: Nice.

- Well any questions please comment on the blog. We would love to hear what you think. And if you have any terms you may have heard from Mike or any terms that I missed feel free to share we would love to read them. And if you read these blogs tell your friends to visit and drop comments we would love to hear what they have to say. So remember folks, pick your players wisely- don’t sign a slut to a 30 year contract with 30 million up front guaranteed when you don’t know the bitch. Do what’s right, let her earn the big time franchise contract. And if the bitch is always on the (injured reserve/period/laziness) tell that bitch to blow you . And if she says NO she don’t want to take one for the team. Tell that bitch You are the franchise and your ass has just been cut. Peace.

Varganator

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